- There's different ways to be homophobic, and I've encountered I'd say all of them. And one thing to understand is, even if you don't agree, you're not talking to nobody, you're still talking to a person. There's teenagers who have learned these ways from their parents who were incredibly discriminatory. And even if you've learned these ways, there's so much time you can take out of your day just to hear someone else's story and realize that they're also human... there's such a dehumanization of queer people. Almost like we're seen as objects, as inspiration, we're seen as a political ideology rather than a person. Like... when people know that you are queer and they are like « Oh yeah, gay rights! » or whatever, and you are seen less as a person with a personality and more... the first thing they see about you is "Queer".
- A label...
- Yeah, instantly labeled, and that can cause a lot of unconscious bias in people. And, yeah, I'm going to go out of my way to be an activist about my identity, because I believe strongly in my identity, but that's not my defining feature, I'm so much more than « I am queer ».
There's a lot of people who will also specifically be friends with you because you are this, and sometimes that can cause good friendships, and also, it can sometimes feel just incredibly dehumanizing. It's almost like this "gay best friend" trope that you would see in movies and things and... it's less of an outright discrimination, like you can see with other acts of hate and stuff, but you might not be homophobic, might not consider yourself homophobic, but you still see queer people as just queer people, and everything else about them is something less.
- There's a very common thing we hear, like « Oh, yeah, there's john, my gay friend », when it's actually not relevant to know at all...
- Yeah! They just happen to be queer, but it's not queer people's defining trait!